From February 1st this year, the "New Rules" is officially implemented. This threshold across Chinese marriage has been completely discarded by the new era.
"Is your family marrying a daughter or a sell?"
High-priced colorful gift seems to be the high wall of two people in love.Will the phenomenon of more than 100,000 colorful gifts, houses and cars really disappear with the prescribed promulgation?
Why did Jia Pingwa say that most men at the bottom of the colorful ceremony will hit a bachelor. Is it a good or bad thing for ordinary families to "cancel the colorful gift"?
Why does color gift cause men to hit a bachelor
In our marriage, it has been lasted for thousands of years. Cai Li and dowry can be traced back to the Spring and Autumn Period. At that time, the heroes were separated. In order to find allies for marriage, dowry and colorful gifts often represent the face of the country.
In the Qin and Han dynasties in "Han Book", the ancients did not call Cai Li, but they were hiring.No matter which dynasty is, the custom of Cai Li is slowly spreading, but the essence of Cai Li is still "face".
"Three books and six gifts" is an indispensable standard marriage process from the princes of the princes to the people of the people, and "The "sign is the gift. The" ritual "here is the property given by the man. After receiving this gift, the two people have legal effect on the marriage contract.
Even in various dynasties, there are "hiring geese" and "hiring deer".There are many examples.
However, in ancient times, it was paid to the door -to -householder, so men in ordinary families could not contact the princes and daughters, and the daughter of ordinary people would follow the law and not ask for property.The problem did not set off a lot of water in the times.
In the Song Dynasty, many families with daughters have been preparing dowry since birth.All, even more specifications than colorful gifts.
This "thick marriage" during the Ming and Qing dynasties changed, and the grade of dowry became higher and higher, which caused many poor people to marry their daughters.Some families even drowned their baby girls and continue to have baby boys, so that they do not need to prepare a large dowry to get the benefits brought by their daughter -in -law.
Human nature is reflected in marriage, and changes in dowry and gifts often change with society.
The Qing Dynasty was destroyed, the traditional feudal social system was eliminated, and Cai Li has not fallen for a while in modern times.On the stage of society.
Social development also affects the collection of color gifts. During the planned economy period, many families advocate boys. Boys have more advantages and can help families get more landBenefit.
So China has a historical peak at this stage, and the concept of "raising children to prevent the elderly and more children and more blessings" is deeply rooted in peoples hearts.Because under that plan, there is land and labor force, and raising children can indeed prevent aging.
This also leads to a horrible gap in the proportion of men and women born at this stage. You can see a family of seven or eight sons, and you can also see five of the five., Six daughters have to continue their son.
Under the surge in population, men naturally occupy a high level in marriage.The daughters family for high -priced gifts often has different ideas.
One is to make her daughter live better in the many families.It is not difficult to find that there were countless cases of trafficking women and children who could not find a daughter -in -law in the last century.
It is too difficult to get married for ordinary families.High -priced gifts, there are more and more men who are in the bachelor, and even many places have "Single Village".
Of course, the reasons that lead to more and more bachelor can not be completely attributed to the high gift, and some of the reasons are women.
Who is the benefit of the marriage?
"Youre going to marry me,", "Who children are as big as you are not married?"First exposed.
Because of the rapid development of the countrys economy, many cities have changed further in terms of material or ideas.For marriage, they have different cognitions from the elders.
It must be explained first, this is not a rebellion, but the inevitable result of economic development.It has long been notice with Japan and South Korea.
Now China has entered a society with low fertility and divorce. Women are unwilling to be "good wives and mothers". Many women also have their own careers. They do not expect only family and fertilityReflecting your own life value.
But for men, the awakening of this female consciousness makes marriage more difficult. With the improvement of the economic level, many families of married daughters have also appeared.In concept, Cai Li became the trial stone of the mans family.
Just like Jia Pingwa wrote in "Sitting", "A man who is not willing to spend money for you, you must not love you."This kind of concept is indeed a utilitarian society in a utilitarian society. Everyones family conditions are similar. How can it prove "love" and "not suffering"?
Cai Li replaced the woman first. Of course, this sentence is actually not suitable for everyone. After allThe elevation of colorful gifts, the character and concept of the mans family also account for a large part of the reason.
Under the influence of "domestic violence, whether it is valued by my in -laws, inherited incense" and other factors, there have been more and more problems in the society on high -priced gifts in the societyEssence
Is it really appropriate to high -priced gifts in society?From the perspective of the man, the high -priced colorful gifts can be half -life, so the daughter -in -law becomes the scapegoat of Cai Li. To this end, the mans family must be paid.
From the perspective of the woman, high -priced color gifts are just the guarantee of "happiness". It seems difficult for this money to exist in the hands of the woman.In the middle, there was even a gift to borrow money, and then returned together after getting married.
Both parties of marriage seem to have not taken advantage of the color gift issue, so that "cheating marriage, cheating, deception,"Cai Li" and other negative news.
Canceling the gift seems imminent. For both parties, what is marriage?What should the marriage of the new era look like?
For young people, marriage is a small home for the establishment of both parties, while Cai Li and dowry are the Qidong funds of new families, but the old concept of "Congfu" has not followedThe development of the times is broken.
"Marry Chicken with Chicken, Follow Dogs" is no longer applicable to new marriage, everyones familyThe conditions are almost the same. The female families who have been violent and the "vampire" type have begun to think about why they are aggrieved as a "yellow -faced wife" in marriage, so the divorce rate slowly came up.
In the new era, there are new winds
In factIt is not to say not to give color gifts, but to eliminate high -priced gifts and let marriage return to the nature of "ritual".Advocating young people in society to enter a new marriage concept. Marriage is not utilitarian exchange, but the emotional bond between two people promised each other and live together.
According to the social environment, the cancellation of colorful ceremonies can indeed alleviate the economic burden of most of the male families, but this is not the root cause of the decline in marriage rate.
To make a hypothesis of canceling the colorful ceremony, there are children after the two parties get married.Do people need to buy a car? In this way, these expenses are even more expensive than Cai Li.
Canceling whether the colorful gift can restore the precarious marriage rate and fertility rate, it can only be said that it may be effective but not great.Dont look at the excitement of men now to cancel Cai Li. It is really at the stage of talking about marriage. Cai Li has become an advantage.
Why do you say that?Because women are gradually sober in marriage consciousness, they start to pay attention to their value in marriage, and can have a son to be a standard for testing "good wives".
Without colorful gifts, it is more valued by the mans character, family conditions, and work potential.Filling, this is inevitable.
After the implementation of the "Ceremony Return and Cancel", whether the quality of marriage can be improved, it remains to be observed, but there is one thing that canIt is clear that for those who are really willing to enter the marriage, Cai Li is the least worthy of mentioning.
and Jia Pingwa said that "most of the underlying men will hit a bachelor" exist in a paradox, one is that the male bachelor has become a fact in society, because there are many men, because there are many menThe proportion of women is destined to have a male bachelor. This is a problem in the historical era. The problem of "whether a baby boy or a baby girl" will not be solved, and it is difficult for society to improve at the spiritual level.
The other is that men cannot reflect their own value through colorful gifts. For some bachelor, the gift is compelled with competitiveness to a certain extent, but the shackles of the colorful ceremony are not just the shacklesMen trapped men, and also bondes women who support their son through colorful gifts.
The problem of colorful gifts reflects social problems to a certain extent.When consensus, these measures are difficult to solve fundamental problems.
Conclusion
Love should not be a exchange of interests, and marriage is not the shackles of both parties.Can there be a person who accompanies his life.
Everyone is looking forward to being able to grow old and respect each other, so you cant look at the issue of color gifts with narrow eyes. In the final analysis, there are more and more male leftover in the real society, Is it really because the "color gift" is not canceled?
Because the platform rules, only when you have more interaction with me, it will be identified as an iron powder.If you like my article, you can click "Follow", and you can receive the article push as soon as possible after becoming an iron powder. Disclaimer: The above content information comes from the Internet. The author of this article has no intention to target them.If it involves copyright or character infringement, please contact us in time to delete it!If there is a doubt part of the incident, delete or make changes immediately after contact.The authors of this article are not responsible for any problems arising from the above or related, and do not bear any direct and indirect legal responsibilities.
